There are many things that I feel inadequate about when it comes to me being a wife and mother. When I was young I always imagined being the 'perfect' wife. The one who always looked put together, who made home cooked meals every night, who kept her house sparkling clean.
Then I got married....then had 3 kids....and now I realize that I am far from that 'perfect' wife that I was sure that I was going to become. It is hard for me to admit that I can't do it all. There are days I am lucky to get a shower, nights where I have no idea what to cook, and my house is buried under piles of laundry, dishes, toys and dust.
It really was depressing to realize that no matter hard I tried...I just couldn't keep up. I am lucky enough to have a wonderful husband who goes to work everyday to earn enough money for me to stay home with my 3 little tornadoes. If I am home all day...then I should be able to do it??? For those of you who are able to do it...please help me out.
My sister has the same floorplan as me. She has a few ladies come every other week to her house. She suggested that I have Berta come and do mine too. Part of me didn't want to do it for a couple of reasons.
- I didn't think Shawn would want to pay for something he thinks I should be able to do on my own.
- If I did have her come...it would fully admit that I am a failure when it comes to this department
After much prodding by Nancy, and her friend Stacy...I finally agreed to have her come. The only problem is that I didn't tell Shawn. Yes I know, probably not the best idea, but I knew if I asked him, he would say no...and honestly I really needed it. So I decided was going to have to ask for Forgiveness rather than permission.
I have felt like I have been treading water (and it is not just from the move...I had this problem in our old house too). I felt like all I was ever was surface cleaning. Trying to keep up with everything was all I could do. It didn't seem to matter how much I tried to "manage my time better" it was never enough. I needed some help.
I cannot tell you how wonderful it was to come home from dropping Caden off from school today. 2 women worked on my house non-stop for 4 hours!!! That is 8 hours of cleaning that would have taken me even longer! Now I have to time get to some of the projects that I have been putting off, and spend more time with my kiddos because I don't have to scrub my floors. Some may think I am lazy, but this is just what I needed. Maybe this can help me get the self depracating tape that I have running in my head everyday. I sure hope Shawn feels the same way.
Wish me luck.